Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Yes. M-fucking-A-A.

My instinct has been a good friend of mine throughout the years.

I am a man of faith, although I can assure you that I am not a good Muslim. And instinct has been one of the crucial components of my faith. I put a huge amount of trust in my instinct more than I trust myself.

My insticnt told me that I will make it thru UPSR with good grades when I was in Primary 6, prior of getting that straight ass 5-As result. Clever, my ass. It was just my luck.

My instinct told me to fuck up my UPU without consulting that asswipe school counselor and let things fall into places, before I ended being in that shabby, old school KPTM college in Kuantan. Never the less, those three years wasted has led me towards a new world far from what I had imagined.

I even started to discover myself. The true me. Things I am really good at. Vice versa.

My instinct told me to dump that bimbo when she told me that she slept with my "bestfriend" for like... what, twice? Yeah.

Weird tho, I did not felt hurt or shit. It was fast, and just. And glad. Good luck on being a whore, bitch.

......wwwwwweeeirrdd.

My instinct told me that my other ex-gf had already met someone when we spent a weekend at her home, and I even could tell who the guy was. Uh-uh.

My instinct told me to quit me studies (even I was very certain that I could pass the course if I stayed) and pursue my career with ROTTW. 'Guess that was the biggest, boldest mutherfukin move I ever made. And I am happy with that.

I met a lot, fuckin lotsa people I never thot I would. New friends. New foes. Backstabbers. Dickheads.

And a new circle of family, starting from the night I went to Capsquare for that epic-fail Steven&Coconut Treez showdown, where I met Jarrod and Celine, hence the others.

I don't consider them as friends. I put no stock of faith in friendship. But family. And the Malay/Arabic term 'sahabat'. 'The fuck is friendship day for anyway? What, to show your appreciation just for a day before you can fuck his day up again on the next day?

Oh well, the saga continues.

My instinct told me to bail from ROTTW at one period, and switched my job to CSC. Working as a Service Desk Analyst. Hmmm. Where in the end I could afford to have my own car and a decent place, newer clothes, better meals, and rests. And to give some to my mum. Fair enough.

My instinct even told me that I will, one day, become a successful person. And I don't give a fuck on what basis it will be. Be it in music, networking, or even owning a gigantic bridal house along Jalan Ipoh. Hoooooshiz, that will be awsumm.

In time of despair, my instinct would be the greatest friend. For instance, my instinct told me to hold on. Stay in that circle of sanity, don't move. Fuck everyone else, you're on your own.

And sometimes for some odd reasons, it tells me to stop chasing the rainbows at times. Get out of the way. Get the fuck out of someone's life. Stop what you're doing. Stop trying to be selfless. Stop thinking that one day people would understand you. Go ahead and be a dick for once. Move on.

Well, who gives a shit about that seven-coloured paraball anyways. You don't.

Instinct is probably the greatest gift from God I ever received. Best I ever had.

And now, it's telling me to get an insurance. MAA, anyone?



Babi, bila nak pukul 5.30 ni. Aku nak balik tido.

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