La Da Di Dum, I am a Boring Bum.

Here are some facts about me, that some of you fellas might not know.

1. I'd always wear a ring on my middle finger with yellowish stone on it. Trust me, that ring, isn't an ordinary one. It holds the key to the universe.

2. I got a feeling that my actual animal totem is either a long Chinese ancient green dragon (serpent like, not the western dinosaur-like) or a blue lion. Yep. Blue. Literally blue, like the Smurfs.

3. I love cats. Or rabbits. Or animals. But I don't really like to keep them as pets. Possibly it is because I am actually allergic to them, also I am too bloody lazy to keep an eye on them. And to keep a pet without providing a better care, is an animal cruelty.

4. I love driving/riding a bike in the rain. Emoemoemoemoemo.

5. I am a selfish, inconsiderate asshole. I do not, in any circumstances, give a floating fuck about anyone. So, if any of you guys think otherwise, then consider yourself lucky, because I fucking love you.

6. I am a vengeful and a rueful motherfucker. I AM karma. You fuck with me, you fuck with the karma. And trust me, you don't want no Nightmare On The Elm Street, baby.

7. I can enlarge my eyes, and look fucking mean. I even scare myself in front of a mirror whenever I did that.

8. I smell nice all the time, even without fragrance. Which is why I don't use body spray much. If you think that I got a BO, you're definitely wrong mofo. Go and check your armpit.

9. I can never get fat, I am always skin.. wait. Halt. Somebody will be pissed if I say that again. There's one picture on Facebook that has THAT comment on it, and eventually I made someone pissed. Really, really pissed. So I deleted it. There, you happy?

10. I am not being sarcastic. I don't do sarcasm. Well, if I ever made you fell like I am being one, well.. to bad honey, it is YOU. Not me.

11. I do believe that the end of the world has begun. I, however, don't believe in any of YOUR scam-chained lettered-"OMFGTHATISSCARY"-fake-prophecies, at all. You're not a fucking prophet. Boo.

12. I am cool, therefore I swear a lot. The fuck do you expect?

13. Most of the time, I got limited knowledge base inside my head. So don't expect me to entertain every stupid question you have in mind. Unless if I love you. Yes, you may do so, and I'll try NOT to get bored with that.

14. If I say I love you, it means I love you. If I say "Go away, please", it means "Kiss my ass, fuck off, eat shit and die". Simple. So pay attention.

15. I never downgrade people (that are in my favorable list), and I do believe by the power of addressing people appropriately. So if I call you by decent names or any terms and I have not change that so far, it means that you are OK. But if I started to address you with, I don't know, whatever unpleasant, it means I fucking hate you. You might just as well die. No shit.

16. I didn't change, I never grew up. It is you who've changed, not me.

17. I am good with knives. And nail clippers. I am the actual Salt.

18. I fucking snore. That, only revealed somewhere last year. And God, I even was scared by my own snore. Oh thanks a lot Tajul, for the video. F you! Haha.

19. I got integrity. And that comes with a price, of course.

20. What you resist, persist. Nothing will ever stop me. Except if God ever wants to pull the plug out of me, I will. Determination is the word, baby.

21. I hate religious fanatics, and racist/supremacist fucktards. If you think that your religion or race is divine and superior, then keep it to yourself, but don't prejudge or discriminate others. There's no way your deity wants you to pick on others who don't do shit to you. Let the world end as it is.

22. I love ice cream, but I hate buying it.

23. I don't really like huge ass birthday/wedding cakes. I do, however, love cupcakes.

24. I am not a quitter. I never quit, I am just taking a pause. Long, short, doesn't even matter.

25. I fucking love Hillary Duff.

26. I am born smart. And at times, I am just playing stupid with you. That's because I don't really want to argue with your stupidity.

27. I could go on with this for hours, but I need to take a piss. Bye fellas.

Tell Me Now, What Do You Stand For - #1

I don't stand for anyone.

And, I am getting sick of standing either. I need to sit. Squat. Or anything that's somewhere below a waist level.

I need to chill. I need a smoke. I need to squat and smoke. That's fucking it.



Oh. I just found out that my leave for next week is not approved.

Oh. Whatever.

Siri Mari Mengepos Benda Bodoh #1

Hari ini aku berjaya membeli sepasang seluar baru.

Dan magiknya, pinggang aku telah bertukar ke saiz 28! (sebelum tu pinggang aku rasanya 32 kot, kecoh betul)

Wau, terasa muda aku. Bagai masih bersekolah di sekolah menengah.


Lihat perutku, sungguh rampingkannnnnn? Terima kasih Tummy Trimmmmmm!

I Am Mineeeee.

I am my own alpha and omega.

I am your nightmare. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

I am going to shoot the sheriff, the deputy, and then I am going to get you.


Welcome to my circle of suffering, bietch.



And still, I am waiting for my night allowance.

Sum Of All Problems

I got so many potholes these days.

Therefore, I just need to look out for ONE more problem, probably a BIGGER one, one that could cover up them potholes. Fill up those moulds.

So that I can concentrate on less problems. Probably one or two.

Well, time to man those battle stations. This is going to be a tough battlefield.

Operation: Manhattan Project 2.

I'm off to war zone, with a high tech mecha. Meeet. Meeeeet. Meet. Meet.

We Don't Need No Education, Baby.

It's a fact that I didn't manage to finish my tertiary education, due to few lame ass reasons. Probably the major part that contributes to the chart was: I screwed up so much, and... financially I don't think at that time, finishing my course was the best option for me.

So I bailed, and worked with a publishing house for about.. 6 months (actually 2 years ), where I did however, learned a lot..

I learned on how to multitask things, how to keep myself sane despite all the pressure of being THE guy in the whole office. To cope up with deadlines. Doing multiple tasks that would probably require several different diplomas.

As far as I can remember, I got no skills on being a journalist. I never knew what are the ethics of being a journalist. I never knew on how does a magazine is produced and shit. But slowly I paced myself. Learn to take pictures using a fucking DSLR without getting bad impressions from pro photographers just by looking at how I'm handling a camera. To interview bands, local and international. Marketing, promotions, record labels, etc etc.

And that, was before almost two years ago, I swapped my job to an IT company. Kinda huge one to say the least. Working as a primary service desk post, dealing with SOE and non-SOE issues (i.e software related issues, emails, basic networking, server issues, SAPs, etc etc), which actually requires at least basic IT diplomas.

I mean, come on. I had three years wasted on a Civil Engineering course. And now, I am one of those people who worked for 9 hours approximately in front of a computer, doing IT shits. And I got NO IT related certificates.. at all, let alone to work in a multi-national IT company that deals with customers all over the fucking world.

I had two solid months of training, and voila. The account went alive. I guess I am quite a lucky ass to make it, until now.

But I never considered luck as a whole picture of it.

The only reason is because I HAD TO.

"Man I had to do this. I had to do that. Ooh, I gotta learn that. Shit, this is hard, imma need to learn on how to make this work".

Etceteraetcetera.

"You need to embrace the current situation and evolve, either that or die", said Abang Rom, once.

Which is, true.

We need to learn on how to overcome things wisely, to pickup skills on the fly, to cope with the fast pace. Living-it-up-not-giving-a-fuck-living-your-live-in-the-fast-lane shit.

Therefore, I tend not to give a fuck about most things. That includes getting self-help guidebooks. Because I don't read much. Except Andrew Matthew's when I was a kid. Even that, was because the book wasn't really contain much texts. The cartoons were funny as hell.

But yeah. All I need is ME.

"I am mine", says Edward Louis Severson III. Pearl Jam, motherfucker!

I don't buy ideologies no more. I don't live with ideologies. I don't have the passion to show that 'oh, I am such a genius. I read Das Kapital for breakfast, listen to Dead Kennedys and Mothers Of Invention for lunch, and a little Chuck Palahniuk for bedtime stories'. I am not a genius, never been one, and I am not really sure that I will ever be one.

I mean, to know and to accept are two different things. I prefer the first option. I had to break down my wall of ego to indulge things.

How do you live with yourself, and at the same time you need to align with other's persepctive? It is you who control your doings, hence the effects that come after. No baby, you don't need other's philosophies to control your life. True, those are the words of wisdom, came from wise men. But seriously, so do you.

I have learned that those 14 years of education which includes my college days, had somehow helped me only 35.67% part of my life. Instincts are my best weapon of all time.

All I need to do, is to accept myself for what I am.

It's the same thing as to love somebody, all you need is to accept the fact that the person is willingly to accept you, to DO things for you, rather than just to SAY the those L words over and over again. Because love, is like a flower. It needs good soils and fertilizers, as well as proper technique and mostly patience, before it can bloom beautifully. No other way.

And in desperate times, there's no one, apart from God's miracle that can save you, except you yourself.

And to live your life, for no one else but you.





PUKIMAKKK! BILA DIAORANG NAK NIGHT ALLOWANCE AKU! Bloody hell.

Politik Dan Melayu Dari Kacamata Aku.

Tajuk entri macam la aku nak tulis thesis. Pastu berlagak macam aku pakai spek (walaupun aku sebenarnya memang rabun). Psh.

Aku membesar dalam keluarga yang kuat politik. Especially parents aku, yang agak tegar dengan Barisan Alternative (sebab tu aku gila Pearl Jam kot?).

Suatu ketika, masa politic turmoil circa 1998, aku ingat lagi macamana marahnya orang-orang yang selama ni tak sebulu dengan kerajaan, atas penangkapan Anwar. Aku budak kot. So aku nganga mulut je la apa orang cakap.

Tapi time tu memang banyak bende banyak jugak tak masuk akal. So, aku pilih untuk berdiam diri, sebab aku lagi suka memerhati. Susah nak percaya mana-mana pihak.

Sampai sekarang jugaklah, sebenarnya aku pun tak tau apa nak kata pasal politik Malaysia.

To be honest, aku tak sokong sesapa pun. Bukan bermaksud aku lalang, sokong mana YB mana yang sumbat duit paling banyak dalam mulut aku. Pada aku, politician merupakan golongan yang memang sangat susah nak duga.

Aku punya rasa hormat pada Tuan Guru Nik Aziz, sebab dia tak beli pun bungalow mahal kat Kenny Hills. Dan aku punya respek yang tinggi untuk Tun Dr. Mahathir, sebab buah fikiran dia yang dia guna pakai untuk membangunkan negara sampai tahap ni, aku tak rasa takat ni ada orang boleh celen dia. Antara pemimpin yang aku sayang sampai mati.

Mungkin tahap itu sahaja kot, punya cetek view aku pasal politik ni.

Sebab diaorang pun manusia. Tabur la janji melaut mana pun, lepas pilihan raya, tak terkejar juga nak tunaikan semua. Tak boleh nak salahkan diaorang jugak, sebab kita semua sama manusia. Kalau kau jadi YB pun belum tentu kau mampu nak jadi robot, attend semua masalah rakyat bawah kawasan kau. Melainkan kalau kau klon Saidina Umar, atau setidak-tidaknya 25% sifat Sahabat tu ada pada kau.

Dan aku tidak menyangkal, ada wakil rakyat yang benar-benar buat kerja. Yang tak peduli parti apa pun yang dia bawa. BN atau BA, tolak tepi.

Cuma yang menyedihkan, tiap kali aku belek suratkhabar, terutama bahagian Dalam Negeri, aku rasa politik tu sangat kebudak-budakkan. Masing-masing cuba untuk mengatakan merekalah syurga, yang menentang itulah neraka.

Yang paling kesian, rakyat. Keliru. Pening. Kaku. Tak tahu nak pilih mana satu.

Dalam usaha nak menarik hati rakyat untuk bernaung di bawah bendera masing-masing, baik kerajaan mahupun pembangkang, kadang-kadang ada diantara mereka yang terlupa (walaupun bukan semua), perkara paling asas, keutamaan bagi rakyat. Keperluan mereka. Itu pun kadang-kadang banyak tercicir.

Yang konon mahu berjuang untuk rakyat pun, adakalanya hanya mampu untuk bagi ceramah mampan berapi-api, liberation shits and stuffs, tapi masih ramai yang lepas menang pilihan raya, tak ada beza mana pun.

Sebab tu, kalau belek suratkhabar, aku lagi seronok baca pasal gosip Diana Danielle kat bahagian Dua. Dari sakit hati dan sedih baca berita yang tak habis-habis mencerca sesama sendiri.

Isu paling aku rasa ketara, ketuanan Melayu. Well, aku tau, ramai yang akan fire aku sebab usik pasal bende ni. "Eh, mat, kalau tak kerana bende tu, kau tak boleh hidup macam ni tau tak?" - aku pernah kena fire bila aku utarakan apa yang aku rasa. Aku tak deny pun? Ada aku kata benda tu buruk? Offensive, might.

Cuma, pada aku, whether ada atau tidak, tak ada bezanya pada aku. Aku tetap kena bayar loan MARA bulan-bulan. Kena jugak bayar credit card. Sewa kereta mahal jugak. Tak masuk jugak UiTM campus induk, walaupun SPM aku 5A 4B 4C - yang mana ramai gile member aku dapat lagi rendah tapi berjaya masuk uni bagus-bagus. Ramai jugak member Cina aku dapat kerja senang-senang dari member Melayu aku yang grad dari US, UK apa suma. Itu semua rezeki, bro!

Ye, aku bangga aku Melayu. Aku bangga kulit aku tak cerah. Cuma, seperkara yang aku pasti, itu semua hanyalah klasifikasi untuk membezakan sapa asal usul kau. Begitu jugak kalau kau Cina, India, Punjabi, Senoi, etc etc.

Ramai yang mengeluh, "Habislahhh.. Melayu takkan jadi Melayu dah", "Melayu akan lenyap 50 tahun lagi", "Melayu hanya tinggal nama". Apa ke lancau kau mencarut tu? Siap tulis dalam buku. Jual kat 7E.

Orang-orang macam ni yang aku tengok, rata-rata diaorang macam ni jengkel dengan golongan Melayu yang tak reti cakap Melayu, tak reti makan sambal belacan gaul nasik makan pakai tangan, cakap liuk lentok, speaking mengalahkan orang yang duduk ceruk ladang kat Britain.

Wake up, yo.

Suka hati diaorang lah diorang nak cakap terbelit lidah pelat macam mana pun. Kau kuis pinggang dia, melatah bahasa melayu jugak. Kalau dia melatah keluar bahasa Itali, memang aku penampar dia lah. Jadi, apa masalah dia pada kau? Kulit dia sawo matang, campak la kat ceruk Seattle sekali pun, tetap diorg panggil dia Asians.

Sebab kau adalah engkau.

"Melayu akan lenyap 50 tahun lagi", apa ke lancau? "Melayu hanya tinggal nama", apa benda tu? Jaminan ke syurga ke kalau IC kau tulis "Melayu"?

Tak.

Apa guna, kalau kau bangga menjadi Melayu, pakai baju Melayu, junjung keris, berbahasa baku, konon nak pertahan hak sendiri, tapi pada masa yang sama, kau menindas bangsa sendiri, berbalah sesama sendiri? Tak. Itu bukan caranya untuk kau pertahan bangsa sendiri.

Hang Tuah tak pernah suruh macam tu. Dia cuma cakap "Takkan Hilang Melayu Di Dunia". Memang zaman dia takde Google, takde iPad. Tapi apa yang dia cakap tu masuk akal. Kau pakailah sehabis Dr. Dre pun, kau tetap Melayu, nak takut apa?

Apa guna, kalau kau bangga menjadi Melayu, tapi mengharap bantuan orang untuk kau berdiri. Parameswara pun bukannya dapat subsidi kerajaan masa nak bangunkan Melaka menjadi empayar. Harta dia sendiri (juga saki baki kuasa/pengaruh yang dia ada), mungkin. Sebab dia royal blood. Mengapa tidak kita?

Itu hak masing-masing nak utarakan buah fikiran. Aku tak kata aku betul. Dan hak juga kalau kau nak bermandi peluh darah air mata mempertahankan hak kaum masing-masing.

Ada aku kisah?

Dan tujuan aku post entri ni bukan nak menghasut sesapa. Lantak kau lah nak undi sapa pun. Nak fight untuk siapa pun. Ini pandemonium aku. Sanctuary aku. Utopia aku. Dunia aku. Apa jugak yang kau perjuangkan, itu hak engkau.

Aku tak salahkan kau pun, sebab aku percaya freedom of speech tu untuk apa. Demokrasi tu untuk apa.

Cuma pada aku, satu hari nanti, himpunnya kita di satu tempat yang sama, tak kira apa bangsa kau. Biarpun betapa bangganya engkau dengan warna kulit kau.




Sebenarnya aku bosan, so aku pun tak tahu aku merapu apa bende. Dan tengah marah, sebab dah dua bulan elaun syif malam aku tak masuk. Pukimak betul.

Random Perv.

Suddenly I remembered, there was once, I said something (which was accidental by the way) to a troubled friend of mine, whom was having a tough time with her boyfriend. Issue with him being anal or something.

Which, went something like this:

"Oh come on. You're being such a pussy, sticking up for a dickhead like him".

Few moments later, we stared, blank-faced, for a minute.

And we laughed, followed by a loud "what-the-fuck!".

And, there was once a friend of mine randomly called me while I was sleeping. We talked about random things for few minutes, before she said, "Oh yeah you know what, _____ (her bestfriend) and I had a period today. On the same day. Wow!"

Out of the blue (and the fact that I was still half-asleep), I replied, "Oh, so that makes you girls bloodsisters now?"

And after a while, we were like, "EEEEUUUW!".


My subconscious mind IS pervy, mind you. Especially when I am hungry, like now. So pardon my fucking language.

Oh I know you know that I am awesome.

"Someday, young man.. you will."

I came across this old guy at No Black Tie few days back.

Sure, he probably didn't even know my name. But yes, I recognized him, even from far.

So I approached him, and he greeted me with a smile on his face.

"Sir, can I take a picture with you?"

"Oh, sure!"

"You are, a living legend, sir", I said, with a grin.

"Ohhh no, young man. I am not. Well, someday YOU will be the one who's going fill in the shoe. To replace me. Someday", said the old guy, with a slow paced, deep wise old man's voice, not to forget the warm smile on his face.

And with a help from a friend, I got a picture with him.

"Thank you, sir!"

"You're welcome," he said, before he continued with, "I hope you that you will succeed in whatever you are doing in your life, and to become somebody."

He laughed.

Wow.

That was the shortest starstruck moment I had in my whole life. Yet it was worth every single second.

The man that had seen it all, been thru it all, a man who knows what it takes to become a true musician.


That man, Josie Thomas, is a bloody legend. :)

Look how happy I am in the picture. Haha.

"Ore waaaa Moe desu, yoroshikuuuuuuh!"

Ada la satu petang yang hening, aku kat No Black Tie, Jalan Changkat. Tu pun lepas aku rimas dapat dua tiga call dari manusia yang berbeza (punyalah nak tunjuk yang aku ni ramai sangat nak call, poodah!), ada lagi satu nombo DiGi call aku.

Begini ceritanya:

"Assalamualaikum, dan selamat petang Encik Mohhhammad Fairuzz Hussssaini bin Kammaruddin" (gile dia punya idgham ma'al ghunnah nak sebut nama aku, abis arab la tu?)

"Err.. waalaikummussalam, ya saya?" (aku time ni mula la fikir kawan aku dok buat prank call, so aku jawab macam pukimak sikit, juga dalam mode berhati-hati)

"Okay, saya dari pihak Maybank ingin bercakap dengan encik (nama aku lag, malas nak tulis), tentang.. penggunaan.. credit card encik ye. Kami cuma nak memastikan bahawa encik sudah menerima credit card anda, betul?" (okay dia dah mula formal, so ini bukan prank call dari Manja. Nada, normal)

"Ye betul. Kenapa ye encik?" (ececeh, formal kolar putih la konon)

"Okay, saya nak pastikan yang encik ambil card tu dari bank atau dihantar kerumah?"

"Saya ambil di bank.."

"Okay, jadi saya nak pastikan nombor credit card encik, sama dengan nama yang encik daftarkan untuk credit card tersebut (sebut nama aku lagi), benar ya?"

"Err.. ya?"

(Dan selepas beberapa lama dia convince aku nak confirm nama aku dengan card, letih sial nak layan mamat ni, he came out with a line yang buat aku agak alert sikit)

"Boleh encik Fairuz bacakan nombor yang tertera di atas kad anda?"

"Err.. kenapa ya encik?"

"Tak ada, macam ni encik Fairuz ya, kami cuma nak memastikan yang credit card tersebut benar-benar berdaftar di atas nama encik.."

"Oh.. tapi saya dah buat tiga empat kali purchase dengan kad ni, online dengan offline, semua masuk je dalam account saya. Nak kena reconfirm lagi ke?" (time ni aku dah mula bau-bau bacang dah)

"Ya, kami kena pastikan semula, takut ada kesilapan di dalam sistem akaun kami ya encik Fairuz..." (decent gile mamat ni)

"Kesilapan? Oh okay.. hmm.. tapikan.. bukan ke kalau pihak bank nak tahu, mereka boleh check dalam sistem registry? Kan ada active directory, boleh simpan semua transaction data dengan maklumat akaun?" (ceeewah, aku saje je shoot dengan terms gempak sikit, konon power ah tu)

"Oh, tidak ye, macam ni ye encik Fairuz.. bla bla bla (dia ceramah aku pasal penerangan apa lancau tah) dan kalau benar-benar terbukti yang kad ini kepunyaan encik Fairuz, kami mahu pastikan keselamatan encik terjamin dan tidak terlepas ke tangan orang lain"

"Oh.. tapi.. jap, encik dari pihak bank kan, kenapa call dari nombor DiGi?"

"Ya, sebab kami ya encik Fairuz (rajin gila ulang nama aku macam tu, nak address encik tiap kali) kami menggunakan talian DiGi business plan ya" (adoiyai, gila kedekut Maybank punya call center pakai mobile plan? Lawak. Takde duit dah ke nak bayar TM?)

"Okay, tapi kenapa perlu minta number dari saya? Kalau encik dari pihak bank, mesti encik boleh detect transaction saya, itu pun mesti valid, kalau takde clash dalam sistem"

"Ya, tapi polisi kami, biasanya kami tak simpan number kad encik dalam sistem, biasanya kami akan padam selepas kami dah configure akaun pengguna kad..." (dia sudah mula memecah tembelang sedikit demi sedikit)

"Delete? Kenapa? Kan ke payah kalau delete, pastu nak call balik? Plus, kalau encik delete, bererti encik delete la data pengguna saya sekali, confirm saya tak boleh pakai sekali. Kalau encik nak mintak saya, baik check kat AD je?" (nailed!)

"Oh tidak, kami cuma lakukan perkara tersebut demi keselamatan. Dan selepas pengesahan, kami akan hantar lagi satu bonus card untuk kegunaan harian encik.. juga ada banyak keistimewaan yang ditawarkan" ( yang langsung takde kena mengena langung ngan Maybank. Pastu dia bukak cerita pasal privilege card apa bende tah. wait, privilege card? Woi! Kau ni ajen bank ke ajen pelancongan?)

"Oh ya? Tapi concern saya sekarang ni, kenapa perlu beri nombor? Dan mesti kad privilege tu ada cas tambahan, sampai nak mintak nombor macam tu sekali? Saya bukan apa, sebab saya nak tahu je, saya pun kerja buat SAP account, kerja dengan transaction apa suma.." (again, trying to sound gempak lidat wooo)

"Ohh.. itu kerana (dia duduk ulang balik statement sebelum sebelum), tak apa, kalau begitu, kami check dengan data entry kami, nanti kami call balik ya? (oh, ada pulak? Tadi kata dah delete?) Assalamualaikum encik Fairuz!"

"Waalaikummusalam".

*hung up*


U'VE BE3N PWNED, MOTH3RFUCK3R!!!

Man, I am awesome. At least, I felt awesome.

Buahahahaha!

So, korang, beware. Jangan senang-senang bagi maklumat akaun kat random call. Sebab tu bank data entry sistem tak selonggar yang disangka. Takkan sewenang-wenang dia nak call pakai random mobile number pastu mintak maklumat. Smart plan, my ass. Fuck you heaps.


"Ore waaaa Moe desu, yoroshikoooouuuuuuh!!!" (dengan tone anime watak Onizuka Eikitchi)

Ye, sila bayang aku project dialog tu dengan nada yang betul.

"Now, to define love.."

Man this is such a random post.

A slide thought that crossed me while I was driving through the highway. Especially after I had a phone call from a.. quite close friend of mine, about his relationship with his girlfriend that is currently on the edge.

To tell you the truth buddy, I don't really have much to say, nor knowing what to. In fact, I couldn't lay any line especially after you asked me, "If she loves me so much, how could she possible did that stupid thing in the first place? What is love, anyways?"

My, my. Gila bunga sial ayat kau. Nasib baik kau belanja aku nasik campur aritu.

Well, love.

The cheekiest topic of all. "Geli" - some might say that. "Apa barang doh" - that, too.

But that's what makes the world go round, that's what most of us believed. Of course, you wouldn't be reading my crappy posts right now if you weren't born. And in order for you to do so, I'd probably say that love brought your parents together and.. you know, hence, your existence.

Do the math, lancau.

Now if you ask me, brother, "what is love" - woo, man. That's quite mind-torturing.

How ironic that most of my closest friends would come and consult their love issues with me, while I was pretty unsure whether I could be a saving grace in order to keep them sane from time to time. And not to mention, I do spin on my own axis of issues as well, including that four lettered word.

The word that drove most people crazy. Makes the world go round. Whatever.

Dude, Love, is indefinite. Indescribable. Immortal. As simple as that, probably. But to define the root cause of it would consume loads of time for the explanation.

Funny how some people would say, "He confessed to me! Geez! Imma try and see how far we can go from here". "I met a girl few days ago, and she asked me out yesterday. Dude, she's fucking hot, mind you. Oowyeah." Which, in essence, they're trying to convince in a summary: I'm in love weh!

Wise.

But yeah, like I said, it is indefinite.

You can love a person from far, even though she might not know that you even existed at the very least, that is love.

You'd do whatever it takes to make her happy even if she's with someone else, knowing that you won't be getting anything in return, that is love.

You might be the wisest son of a gun of all time, but whenever you're with someone that clearly you had your feeling with, it's like there's a switch that can turn you to be a dumbass in just one simple flip, and do whatever she tells you to do. That is love. Stupid, I might say, but it is.

You'd shut yourself up whenever she talks about unimportant, unnecessary things, or about someone that you don't even give a bloody flying letter F, but still, you're paying attention like that's the most important thing, that matters the most to you. That is love.

You shield yourself when she said something that hurts you like shit. That is love.

You'd drown into the sea of wrong with a t-shirt that prints "I am Mr. Right", even though everything she said is utter nonsense. That is love.

You'd sacrifice your times willingly just to make her happy, and for the sake of having her, that is love.

You'll stay on the course, even if it leads you to nowhere, as long as you can be with her (in the event of requited love shit) until the day she will personally tell you to fuck off. That is love.

You'll risk yourself, to be hurt in the end, and to bear the consequences after, that is love.

....ohh yeah, I just showered you with cliches. Tell you what? Nevermind those bullshits, dude.

But mind you that love, is not like some chemistry projects that you can experiment on. You can't go on with a person on a "we'll see what happens next" basis. That is, if you're asking me from my POV. True, que-sera-fucking-sera. But that depends on how you maneuver it.

It takes time to tie up the bond. And actions.

I'm not fond with words, I am a man of actions, I'll do whatever it takes to do to stay on the board. And I might swallow those bullshit lines above as my creed. But that's just me.

So as for you buddy, next time if you feel like getting it on with someone, think. And show some balls while you're at it. Not literally lah bodoh.

Tengok, kau buang masa aku lagi. Nasib baik kau belanja aku nasik campur.

Now, if I got your question answered, excuse me. I need my sleep now. 'Ta.